Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Disaffected Youth

So one of my all-time favorite quotes comes from a Nick Hornby book. And of course I will misquote it now because I don't have the book in front of me. (It also is in the film by the same name, High Fidelity and by the way, I am in love with John Cusack). The quote is something along the lines of . . . I felt like a poser, one of those people who shaved their heads and then claimed they'd always been punk. That quote spoke very deeply to me in my younger years, that awkward time when everyone feels that they don't fit in and never will.
What i DIDN'T expect was to feel that way again. I sometimes walk into my office with my bold doorplate in my suits, with my ever-present Blackberry and coffee cup, balancing files and briefcase and think to myself, "Somewhere someone seriously screwed up. I can't believe that someone believes that I know what I am doing. I can't believe that I have the authority to authorize drafts for obscene amounts of money. Any day now they're going to figure this out and I will be out on my ass."
Is this a common feeling? Who knows? As I taught my assistant about a week after I started, sometimes we just have to put our big girl panties on and deal with shit, don't we?
So here's to big girl panties and dealing with shit.

1 comment:

  1. Have you seen SLC Punk? There's a great scene between the father and son about "selling out" versus "buying in." And I think every rational person feels this way some time in their life, which means that certain ex-presidents have never, ever felt that way.