and yet one more reason I'm going to hell

Hi all,
I haven't died or been seriously injured or kidnapped by a transvestite Johnny Depp. Instead, I've just been really frickin' busy. So this will not be a long post, or even an interesting post, just a quick rant.

I have been getting e-mails from my co-workers about their upcoming schedules. Keep in mind that I have been working so hard and so long that I haven't been able to blog. I even (gasp) worked Saturday. (Hey I'm salaried, I am not getting compensated for that.) Just to give you an idea of the e-mails.....
Upcoming schedule:
Thursday April 09 - 19/30
Friday April 10 - Holiday
Monday April 13 - Vacation
Tuesday April 14 - Vacation
Wednesday April 15-Vacation (maybe)

My assistant even declared her unavailability the 13-16th. Now that doesn't seem traitorous, but it is. the 15th is Tax Day, not just for federal income tax but for property tax in a good many states. I am in the midst of filing more than 1000 returns and my assistant takes next week off?!? Traitorous bitch....or maybe I'm the bitch and she doesn't want to be around me next week...food for thought.

Friday is a corporate holiday here. (I guess because we're all Christian and want to celebrate Good Friday instead of MLK day, WTF?) I'm pretty sure the fact that I resent Good Friday as a holiday and that I secretly envy (read seriously hate all co-workers who are taking vacation) my vacationing co-workers, I am going to hell. And guess where I will be Friday? In my office, by myself, cussing at the copy machine. Sometimes it sucks being me. Wait, isn't that the definition of Hell: Working for no money on a corporate holiday by yourself?
On the bright side, one of my co-workers made me smile with the following email:

Since everyone else is sending out a schedule I figured I should do so too. I am going to be here all week.

I feel ya Jim. We'll get beers and make fun of all those losers on vacation. It'll be fine, as soon as I'm done crying.

A Sweaty, Smelly Day

Chronicle of my Day:

630..ready for work, have time to make and DRINK coffee before leaving

7:30...drop car off at car fixing place and get shuttle to work

7:48...Facebook status = Random Real Estate is feeling bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Feeling very positive and optimistic

8:15...Take phone call regarding how to figure rent for a fixture that is recessed and flush-mounted to the wall (don't ask, but general geeky hilarity ensues)



9:30...discuss problem with Bossman

10:07...asked to review property tax valuations on assets
10:08...realized I don't know crap about valuing this type of asset
10:09...called Admin and asked who normally reviews these values
10:10...started to sweat

10:35...found out the income data needed for me to review the values is in SAP
10:36...feeling much better about myself b/c now I know where to get the information (See, I can do this).


10:42...I can't figure out how to use SAP
10:43...continue sweating
10:45...Maybe if I do this, or this, or this it will work?

11:00...Call Admin ask for help with SAP. Am promised a name and number in 30 min.
11:02...distracted by shiny object


11:35...miss Admin's call (she's five minutes late with the information)

11:45...Go to lunch


12:30... return from lunch
12:31...check messages, car center place called...repairs will be 500
12:32...Realize they said $500 DOLLARS WTF?!?
12:33...Continue to string together an amazing assortment of curse words, 500???

12:45...finish cursing the heavens, earth, Pontiac, the @ss who ran me off the road, metal that bends, tires, and life in general

12:47...realize that I am quite sweaty but figure I'll cool down and dry off now that I am no longer trying to burst a blood vessel by raising my blood pressure.

1:00...Call computer guru guy

1:20...Confident I can now beat SAP

1:30...made it through the first SAP world but failed on my second. Yes, I want to play again. I can do this.

1:45...Failure again. A computer program will not beat me. I will persevere

2:15...Now this is a matter of pride. I can do this, and without calling Guru guy back.
2:17...Car Center calls back...$75 extra for the fancy sensor...grrrr!!

2:20...Attack SAP again. I will win damn it!

2:30...Not ready to admit defeat.

2:45...Retreat may be imminent

3:00...I am beat and broken by SAP.

3:15...realize that I smell and forgot to put deodorant on today.

Currently, Can I go home?

Torturing the Admin

So, I started feeling guilty today about the project I handed off to the admin with about 30 seconds of explanation, an e-mail typed under the table with my Crackberry (spelling and punctuation optional), and roughly 7 inches worth of documents as I ran out the door late to my second meeting of the morning, which for some reason, she had scheduled 2 min after the first one on separate sides of a several hundred acre complex?!?

Now I'm thinking maybe I shouldn't be feeling guilt. After all, if I were a completely self-sufficient, extremely efficient, be able to be in 2 places at once, and in general be able to pull my own head out of my ass type person, she'd be without a job. Maybe she should feel good about the 7 inches of documents to sort, scan and upload. Yeah, that's it. Right?

In short, I love my admin and if she ever leaves me I don't know what I'll do, but I do know what I won't be doing: showing up to anywhere on time or remotely prepared. In general, I'd fall apart.

Do you think a bottle of booze for Valentine's Day makes up for the crappy job, i.e. taking care of me?